An Obsession with being Single.

Or rather, not being single.   I hate it, and yet I like it.  I like not having anyone to answer to, being able to make immediate decisions without having to wait on input from a 'partner', sleeping late, staying up late, getting up early or going to bed early, without anyone asking me why, or getting upset that I do.  Eating a meal when I want to, and not being on a time table for someone else.  Rushing home and rushing around making sure everything is okay before "he" walks in the door.  Taking 2 hours in the bathroom if I want and not having "him" come in and plop his butt down and bother me. There are so many little things that are nice about being single and home alone.   

But then there are those things that you miss too.  Yelling back as you walk out the door "honey, I'm running to the store, do you want me to pick up anything for you?", having someone there to help you make those hard decisions and point out options that you don't think of on your own, someone to sleep in with on Sunday morning, stay up late with on Friday night, snuggle up with in the early evening hours and doze off with you.  Someone to cook for and tell you how they like the food.  Praising you for the hard work you do keeping the house in shape and making things easier for them when they've had a hard day at work.  Someone to come in the bathroom and sit with you and talk about their day when you are taking that long overdue relaxing bath, maybe wash your back...or even sit in the tub with you.

Yep for every little reason that you enjoy being single, the same little reason can be turned to be enjoyed and appreciated by sharing it with someone.   There are days I miss all the togetherness, and days I love being a lone individual.   Sometimes we have no choice giving one of them up, and the other, we have all the choice in.    I'm doing a balancing act in my mind right now, wanting both and not quite sure which one I want more.  

Is there a point to this blog? Nope, just some rambling thoughts.  I do that every now and then.  When I've had too much time to think.