What are friends for?

As is the norm for me, I'm posting this across all my blogs, so if you see it elsewhere.....sorry. LOL

I have been thinking about this all day, and a lot of thoughts have run through my head. I decided to blog about those thoughts, if I can manage to remember what most of them are.  They amount to what I expect out of a friend, and what my interpretation of a friend is.

There are many levels of friendship, from the mere acquaintance that you get along fine with, to that one person who is truly your best friend.   I have had few real best friends in my life, but those that I have called 'best' are those that I still have a friendship with, even if we haven't seen one another for many years. For me, a friend is someone that I want to spend time around, talk to and share parts of my life with. That friend feels the same way about me.  I have and want friends that are both male and female and from all ages.  As an adult, I don't define who can be a friend by sex or age.  Everyone offers something in the relationship.  When I call you my friend, there are only a couple of things I expect out of you.  To be honest with me, even if that honesty may hurt my feelings or piss me off.  If you are really my friend, I'll get over those feelings and you will still be my friend.  And other than mutual companionship between the two of us, I expect nothing more.  If sitting for hours having a conversation is fun, productive, enlightening, emotional, etc, that's really great.  And what I'm looking for.  If we have common interests and spend time exploring those interests together, that's great, and also what I'm looking for.  But am I going to call you up and ask for help everytime I need a screw turned, or ask for money, when I am broke for a minute?  Most likely not.   Will you hear me bitch about that screw needing to be turned, or the fact that I'm broke?  Most definitely, but all I want is for you to listen, not do anything about it.  I want someone to be my sounding board when I need one, and I'll be yours if you need to vent.

My friend will understand that I have crappy days and I'm not always in a good mood.  So when I'm short with them, they won't take it personal and get bent out of shape. Instead, they will ask me what's crawled up my butt and died today. I'll probably laugh at their choice of words, and then tell them about whatever has me biting bullets.

My friend will get to know me well enough to know that I'm a shy person who doesn't open up about things I feel or think so easily.  They will learn that I'm the kind of person that doesn't really like to bother other people. Who has little self confidence in herself and what other people think about her, or feel about her, and needs to be told a million times if it's okay to call them up.  My friend is a confidence builder, not a ego booster.  Only tells me those things that are true, and never tells me what they think I want to hear.

My friend is a person that isn't afraid to let me know that I've been neglecting them, but also accepts that they are not the first priority in my life.  They are the third.  My home and family first, work is second, then my friends. If you happen to be a friend that lives in my home or works where I work and I'm neglecting you, then shame on me....and tell me so!!!

My very best friend in the whole world though, is going to be the person that wants to share their life with me as more than a friend.  There can be only one of you to fill that role.  That friend will be all of the above, and then some.  But I have learned to not have any rigid expectations from even that friend.  It will never be my place to expect more from anyone than they are willing to give. And that is what friends should do, give only what they are willing to give based on the level of friendship you have achieved..   

Accept me as I am, and love me anyway.  As I will accept them as they are.

What are they for?  Hopefully,  friends are for life.