Regional saying

When someone approaches you who looks really rough, like maybe they had a little to much Jim Beam the night before...... 

Look what the dogs drug up and the buzzards wouldn't eat!

or.....

You look like you've been eat by a wolf and $hit off a cliff!

How about.. you spent the night with someone after getting falling down drunk.. you need to be thankful that:

You didn't catch what Ajax wont wash off and penicillin runs from!

Another good one..

 Where my and Zia's sister lives in KY.. there's a phrase used by the local retailers:

Can I tote your poke?

The question I beg of you: Would you slap them?

You'd have to ask FMTD about my sayings. I don't even realize they are things people don't say around here until she says something to me about it. I grew up in the Missouri Ozarks, its kind of fun when she goes home with me. We will leave somewhere and she will look at me and say "What did they say to you?" :D

If you are really struggling with a low kid in class or your test scores come back and there is that one kid that F'd it up, my principal will say...

You can't make chicken salad out of chicken shit.

It always seems to make you feel a little bit better!

What the heck does that mean?

Can I carry your groceries? 

Ah, I bet that's it!  LMAO!

Why a bag is a poke is really beyond me but I've heard that saying before.  

I had a friend once that used to say "I'm so hungry my stomache is about to eat clear through to my backbone!"  God love her!

My dad says something similar.....my stomach's chewing on my backbone.